Miles Apart, Worlds Away: Is Long Distance Really Worth It?
JUST ASKINGLOVE
Victoria Guillou
11/28/2024
© Colonne / Dupe
This one’s for Grace, Valentina, Maria, Mariel, Stepany, Samantha and Blanca Ruiz —You did not choose the easy one...
Picture this: You’re scrolling Instagram, eyes landing on a post of a sunset so beautiful it makes your heart ache. But instead of enjoying it in the moment, you’re squinting at the caption, deciphering whether it’s a cryptic shoutout to someone miles away. That, my friends, is the essence of long distance—always wondering if the effort is worth it while juggling the occasional thrill and constant logistical chaos.
But let’s not restrict this to romance. Long distance isn’t just about star-crossed lovers; it’s about anything you’re tethered to across miles: friendships, family, dreams, or even that perfect pizza joint you left behind when you moved cities. The question is universal: When is the distance worth bridging, and when do you let go?
The Fantasy of Long Distance
Long distance relationships—whether they’re romantic, platonic, or professional—often start with the allure of possibility. The idea that something (or someone) is important enough to stretch the limits of time zones and patience feels noble, almost cinematic. It’s You’ve Got Mail meets Interstellar—an emotional black hole pulling you toward connection despite the physical divide.
But... In reality, long distance is less about heartfelt letters and more about Wi-Fi battles, timezone math, and conversations that feel more scheduled than spontaneous. Sure, FaceTime is a modern marvel, but it’s no substitute for shared silences or simply being in the same room.
Distance can make the heart grow fonder—or it can make the heart grow resentful of a buffering screen.
When Long Distance Works
Sometimes, distance can actually be a blessing in disguise. For starters, it forces you to communicate. When you’re miles apart, you can’t rely on physical presence to patch up misunderstandings or avoid tough conversations. You either talk it out or watch it unravel.
Distance also breeds intention. If you’re still making the effort to connect despite the miles, chances are it’s meaningful. The distance can act as a sieve, filtering out what’s truly important from what’s merely convenient.
Take friendships, for example. We all have that one friend who’s terrible at texting but somehow remembers to call you on your birthday or send a postcard from a trip. These bonds may feel stretched thin but are often anchored by mutual care.
And sometimes, distance forces growth. Moving to a new city for college, chasing a dream job, or even just exploring the world can teach you who you are outside of your comfort zone. You learn that missing someone doesn’t mean losing them—and that your life can expand even as your heart aches for what you left behind.
When Long Distance Doesn’t Work
Let’s be honest: not everything is built to withstand the strain of distance. Relationships of any kind require more than shared memories—they need shared moments. And when those moments are reduced to pixelated laughter and texts that read, “Sorry, I fell asleep,” the cracks begin to show.
Sometimes, the effort becomes lopsided. One person does the calling, the visiting, the remembering. And while they’re busy holding the rope, the other person is…drifting. That’s when the question of worth becomes painfully clear.
Because here’s the thing: long distance isn’t inherently noble. It’s a choice. And sometimes, choosing to let go doesn’t mean you didn’t care; it just means you’ve prioritized your own growth, happiness, or peace.
The Verdict
So, is long distance worth it? It depends on the distance—and what’s on the other side.
If the connection enriches your life, pushes you to grow, or simply makes you smile on a bad day, then yes, it’s worth the patchy calls and missed signals. But if the distance leaves you feeling more drained than fulfilled... It might be time to reevaluate. Life is full of spaces we can’t always bridge. But sometimes, those spaces teach us something profound: not all distance is meant to be conquered. Some is meant to be accepted. Whether it’s a long-distance relationship, a faraway dream, or a friendship hanging by a thread, the real question isn’t, Is it worth it? The question is, Are you willing to work for it?
Because no matter how far the miles stretch, the connection has to be strong enough to make it feel like home—even if home is only a place you visit every now and then.
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